Friday, April 27, 2007

Spellings on Technology

Just found an interesting article posted on this week's Carnival of Education over at http://www.educationwonks.com

Margaret Spellings after deliberating with "some of the greatest minds in education" is planning on cutting funding for the single remaining technology program for K-12 schools. Every Child Left Behind rears it's ugly head again I guess.

If you'd like to read it, here's a link:
http://www.dangerouslyirrelevant.org/2007/04/margaret_spelli.html

Quiz Whiz

Well one of my geniuses forgot his pencil this morning as well as paper and notes. So he got to use a crayon to take the quiz that he didn't study for.

Apparantly the function of the nervous system is to tickle your armpits (this is from a 7th grader). And the parts of the respiratory system are the heart and the stomach. These are actual answers scribbled on a sheet of copier paper to only 2 of the 14 questions on today's quiz.

I HAVE NEVER HAD SUCH A STRUGGLE TO GET A QUIZ DONE WITHOUT TALKING IN MY LIFE! And yes I meant to shout it. It is all I can do to keep from shouting it at these children. They have no interest in work , or even trying to learn anything. I am amazed at the group I have this year. And I am not the only one to have commented on it. Their teachers from last year and this year have all commented on the apathy of this particular group of students.

Well the year is almost over, and I am trying to make the best of it by not assaulting anyone's child physically or verbally although the thought to curse at them has crossed my mind increasingly since winter break. I feel like I have brain turrett's syndrome because I keep thinking random curse words in their general direction. Mostly "What the HE** are you thinking?" and "What the *&%@ is your problem!!!!???" and the occasional "OH MY BLEEPING GOD!"

I dread the year that my son enters 7th grade, because from speaking to their parents they were all straight A students and perfectly behaved angels until they entered middle school. Apparantly we dose them on the first day with the vilest poison known to man (hormones) and turn them into raving lunatics for the remainder of the year interested in only one thing . . . GOOFING OFF!

It amazes me that this is the future. I wonder what will happen to us in 20 years when these are the people in charge of the world. Those of us who are now responsible adults are just going to have to live forever because, these will be adults who will be glued to the XBOX too long to go out and earn a living or run a country. Perhaps the president of the United States and the Prime Minister will have to play Call of Duty 1045 on the XBOX 360 squared live. That is the future of war anyway. The US Army is recruiting gamers online using a computer game to simulate real war, because the war in Iraq is apparantly just like a video game.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Shout Out

I just found the most hilarious post on hoboteacher.com. Here is a link:
http://www.hoboteacher.com/blog/2007/02/work-on-your-classroom-management.html

It just sounded to me like the math class next door was going to come stampeding through my wall for the umpteenth time this week, and it got me to thinking about classroom management. While I agree that it is very necessary for a teacher to have some essential classroom management skills, those skills would in no way prevent some of the insane things my kids have decided to do during the past few years. And I was wondering what kind of control I really have over them. I can impose some completely useless consequences such as detention, but in the long run these things never really matter to the kids. I can call home, but many of my parents do "nothing" to their kids for misbehavior (as they so often love to tell me the next day at school).

So I guess my 6th period class keeps muttering "cheeseburger" under their breath because I allow them to do it. And my favorite student from first keeps asking me can he move, every five minutes whether I've said yes or no to the last 800 requests. Not to mention the student I found sitting on top of a four foot tall cabinet across the hall last week

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Carnival of Education

The Carnival of Education is up and running. Please give it a visit.

Hello Copernicus

The same student referred to in a previous post asked in 6th period, "Does the Sun go around the planets?" Seriously.

What country is this?

The social studies teacher down the hall told me that one of our mutual students asked him "What country is this?" during today's social studies lesson. It kind of surprised me since this was one of our more advanced students. I might have expected it from one of those who is on a 2nd grade reading level in the 7th grade, but from what I have seen she is at least on grade level. At first I thought she may have been kidding around, just asking silly questions, but obviously not. Apparantly she turned around and told the person behind her, "See, I told you so." I'm glad that she was right about the name of our country. What I want to know is who was wrong? And what did they think it was?

It reminds me of a story I heard from the Language Arts teacher across the hall from me last year. On career day, the speak referred to making a business trip to Spain during the last year. One of the students asked if the teacher had even been to Spain. It turns out that she had vacationed in Spain around 5 years earlier. When they heard her reply, one of them asked, "Which Spain did you go to? The over by France or the other one." To which the teacher replied, "The one over by France." I think she dropped it at that point because she wouldn't tell me where the other one was.

Hello

My name is Jessica, and I am a middle school teacher from the Southern United States. For obvious reasons I'd rather not give my last name or any identifying information about my school. I have been tempted to write a book to tell about the adventures and interesting events that I have faced in the four years I have been teaching 7th grade students.

I never cease to be amazed by what they come up with to say or do. I have seen some things that would probably curl my mother's hair. (And let me just say, it's a darn good thing she's not a teacher, or she'd probably be in jail by now.)

I intend this blog to be as humorous as possible, with perhaps just a little bit of me having to blow off steam every now and again. I'm not planning on complaining about the state of things although I may be forced to lapse into it every now and again. If I get too far into it please let me know. I appreciate any and all feedback/sympathy/humorous anecdotes you can provide. Please feel free to vent your own frustrations in your comments. I know that this is a frustrating, stressful job, and I am looking to alleviate as much of that stress as possible. So thank you for reading. See you all on the flip side.